RELATIONSHIPS

Relationships With People

4 Wrath is cruel, and anger is outrageous; but who is able to stand before envy? In this instance envy is jealousy. Jealousy is sin. Envy/jealousy is the opposite of love. “Do not covet etc., the last of the ten commandments. The New Testament addresses jealousy/envy. 1 Corinthians 13:4 – Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it his not arrogant. Philippians 2:3 – Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. James 3:14-15 – But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. So, envy is demonic.
5 Open rebuke is better than secret love. It is better for us to accept the openness of a friend when they talk to us about our behavior. It gives us time to change. The opposite is true. When we refuse to accept correct someone folks will not tell us what we are doing wrong. The excuse is usually they love us to much to hurt or feelings. A brother – out of love for us – will gentlt tell us when we are headed in the wrong direction. That is why .. 6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful. An enemy will flatter you to your face but they will talk trash about you behind your back. This does not give you an opportunity to grow and change 😦 ! 7 The full soul loatheth an honeycomb; but to the hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet.A person who has a hunger for serving the Lord and for growing in His grace and knowledge will find correction as sweet as honey. But an unteachable person who want to do what they wnat to do when they want to do it will not accept correction. To them correction will be like a bitter pill!

8 As a bird that wandereth from her nest, so is a man that wandereth from his place. Remember whose we are and where we are going or we will stray away from the straight and narrow path. Matthew 7:14  (KJV) “Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.”

Friendship

9 Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart: so doth the sweetness of a man’s friend by hearty counsel. Everyone should have a great friend from whom they can receive counsel, understanding, knowledge and correction, as needed.10 Thine own friend, and thy father’s friend, forsake not; neither go into thy brother’s house in the day of thy calamity: for better is a neighbour that is near than a brother far off.  Once again we see the value placed on the friendship between Christian brothers compared with flesh and blood family members. Proverbs 18:24 (KJV) “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” The spiritual side of this is our relationship with Christ. He is a friend who sticks closers than a brother or any human being who has ever lived.

14 He that blesseth his friend with a loud voice, rising early in the morning, it shall be counted a curse to him. A friend who calls you out infront of others is not doing so out of love. No one needs to know what is going on between the two of you. Bellowing out your conflict for the whole neighborhood to hear is not good. 17 Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend. How do we do that today? How do Christians support each other today?  Matthew 18:20  (KJV) declares ^“For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.” What does that look like today? Acts 2:42-47 (KJV)^“And they continued stedfastly in the apostles’ doctrine and fellowship,[we share the gospel message with each other and we fellowship by gathering together at our assigned fellowship place.” and in breaking of bread, and in prayers. “We spent time together by sharing a meal and praying together outside of church!” Someone told me the other day that they are considering not returning to their church because no one fellowships with them. My statement back to them was “When was the last time that you fellowshipped with anyone outside of church? Have you ever invited anyone home with you?” “And fear came upon every soul: and many wonders and signs were done by the apostles. And all that believed were together, and had all things common; And sold their possessions and goods, and parted them to all men, as every man had need.” They took care of each other even to the point of sharing what they had. “And they, continuing daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, did eat their meat with gladness and singleness of heart, Praising God, and having favour with all the people.”What happened because they were sharpening each other like “iron against iron”? And the Lord added to the church daily such as should be saved.” Maybe this is the problem that we have today. We don’t fellowship with each other in the same way. We will take out friends out to a buffet and we don’t share our burdens with anyone. We rarely share our joys with anyone. We are isolated persons each inhibiting their own island in the rough oceans of life.

Marital Relationships

15 A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike. 16 Whosoever hideth her hideth the wind, and the ointment of his right hand, which bewrayeth itself. A brawling and troubling making wife/mate is like a nagging toothache. It is better to apply novacaine to the ache and stop it. This is where marital counseling is so crucial. Within this century we would handle such a mate with a letter of divorce. That is not showing love to the other person. Neither is remaining silent. We will always take the same challenges with us into every relationship that we establish. It is better to receive the counseling that we need to change our behaviors. They we will appply “ointment” to our relationship that is fraying at the seams and on the hems.

“The Fool, Foolishness, Ignoring Correction”

3 A stone is heavy, and the sand weighty; but a fool’s wrath is heavier than them both. Living with a person who has an explosive personality is a huge emotional weight. It is not easy to learn how to control our anger to the point where we “are angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: ²⁷Neither give place to the devil” (Ephesians 4:26-27). When we function only through the use of verbal of typed abuse we are giving the devil an opportunity to step in and divide and conqueror!

22 Though thou shouldest bray a fool in a mortar among wheat with a pestle, yet will not his foolishness depart from him. 12 A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself; but the simple pass on, and are punished. Transformation only comes to persons who want to be transformed. God will not force us to change. We have to see what He reveals to us and then desire the change. Psalm 139:23-24 (KJV) Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” Seek transformation and we will find it. Seek the Lord and we will find Him.

ATTITUDE:

1 Boast not thyself of tomorrow; for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth. James 4:13-16 tells us to “Go to now, ye that say, To day or to morrow we will go into such a city, and continue there a year, and buy and sell, and get gain:Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away.For that ye ought to say, If the Lord will, we shall live, and do this, or that.” Any plans made without God’s will in our lives will positively fail.

2 Let another man praise thee, and not thine own mouth; a stranger, and not thine own lips. Don’t allow deception to fool us into being conceited. Praise should come from the lips of anyone but ourselves.

11 My son, be wise, and make my heart glad, that I may answer him that reproacheth me. Give credit for our accomplishments where the credit is due. God promotes. God provides wisdom, knowledge and understanding. We have no knowledge that does not come from Him. So when we are questioned, know that He will provide an answer.

18 Whoso keepeth the fig tree shall eat the fruit thereof: so he that waiteth on his master shall be honoured. By our deeds will others know us. When we are engaged in kingdom work we need to know that God is the one who should honors us. When we are engaged in kingdom work for self-praise, God will not honor us!

27 And thou shalt have goats’ milk enough for thy food, for the food of thy household, and for the maintenance for thy maidens. Special occasions required special meats and special drinks. That was the case in the ancient near east. So, to have so much of this delicacy must mean that the owner is doubly blessed by the Lord.

INTEGRITY/ACTIONS

13 Take his garment that is surety for a stranger, and take a pledge of him for a strange woman. We have seen this numerous times in this book of the Bible. Do not sign for credit for anyone.

19 As in water face answereth to face, so the heart of man to man. If you remember the song “the man in the mirror” then you can relate to this. When we look in a mirror we see ourselves. We must remember this one thind when we are dealing with people. They have feelings just like us! No matter how frustrated we get we must consider what that frustration would do to them. If we are hurt by certain words it is highly probable that so will other people!

20 Hell and destruction are never full; so the eyes of man are never satisfied. Enough does not appear to be enough in this verse. But as children of the Lord we need to know when enough is enough.

21 As the fining pot for silver, and the furnace for gold; so is a man to his praise. If one is only satisfied when their ego is being stroked then we have a problem. When we need praise more than anything else we need to look to the Lord for deliverance.

Verses 23-26 talk about the work of a shepherd – whose family did not own their lands forever – compared with God’s provision that is eternal.

23 Be thou diligent to know the state of thy flocks, and look well to thy herds. 24 For riches are not for ever: and doth the crown endure to every generation? 25 The hay appeareth, and the tender grass sheweth itself, and herbs of the mountains are gathered. 26 The lambs are for thy clothing, and the goats are the price of the field.

As we have traveled through this wisdom book we have seen the same threads repeated several times. We have come to comprehend that change – true transformation – comes only from God. He is the only one who can “change our hearts.” If you would like to know more about transformational change just . . . .